(hock-ey hang-o-ver) noun
a severe headache and other side effects caused by the dismal failure of Canadian teams to win the Stanley Cup: a hockey hangover since 1993
Now that we’ve all had a little time to digest another wretched year for Canadian hockey teams, it’s time to get real.
This is the first time in 16 years that no team from “Hockey Nation” has made it to the 2nd round of the playoffs. Only 2 of 7 teams made the playoffs at all. It will soon be 20 years since the Montreal Canadiens won the cup in 1993.
Prince changed his name to a symbol 20 years ago. Jennifer Aniston got her “big break” and made her screen debut in Leprechaun. The dinosaurs of Jurassic Park were running wild all over our imaginations. Ace Of Base was the most popular group on the planet and we were all listening to Blind Melon’s “No Rain” and falling in love with a chubby little girl dressed in a bee costume.
A lot has changed…
There was no reason to suspect the drought was about to hit; a Canadian team had won 8 of the past 10 Stanley Cups. Canada won gold at the 1994 World Hockey Championships and silver at the Olympics in Lillehammer the same year, only losing in a nail-biting shoot-out to Sweden. Our national junior team won the World Championships in 1993 – the start of 5 in a row.
There was reason to be optimistic…
I’m tired of being optimistic. I’m pissed off, depressed and filled with dark thoughts. I feel like our national pride has a concussion from one too many cheap shots to the head. We are a nation built on hockey. We attach an unhealthy amount of self-worth to our “boys” on the ice. When Canadian teams lose we all feel like losers. When Canadian teams lose we burn shit and actually become losers.
Teams from Dallas, Anaheim, Tampa Bay and Carolina have won the Stanley Cup in the past 20 years – THEY DON’T EVEN HAVE ICE IN THOSE PLACES!
I don’t know what the answer is. I’m an “armchair goalie” like everybody else, pissing and moaning about the drought without offering anything substantive to fix it. I will do the “Canadian thing” and get back on board soon enough. I will believe again because that’s just what we do.
I guess this year the hangover is just lasting a little longer…